Change IS hard. Being challenged to get out of my comfort zone and do things "differently" has been a running theme the past year.
Change is HARD.
But that doesn't mean a challenge isn't a good thing...it IS.
First, the Lord challenged me to say "no!"....to everything, except home, husband, and children. No "outside, unnecessary serving"...it has been (and continues to be) very hard to tell countless people who ask me to help/volunteer/assist/serve in multiple capacities, "No, I can't."
I am the epitamy of a "yes" pleaser. Wiping the calendar clean and penciling in only my family and the very basics of life has been an eye-opener to how much I was draining myself in 50 directions. The relationships in these 4 walls have benefitted greatly from this challenge to "just say no"...
Then, the Lord decides that more change was a GREAT idea! (and who am I to argue with the creator, anyway??) Step out there, make more friends, get connected to your community! I joined a local FB group for homeschoolers in my city. I started an informal park play group of homeschooling moms and children. People I never would have met otherwise; wonderful people that the Lord has led me to enjoy and be encouraged with each week. I am finding the truth in the notion that homeschoolers really do have their own little network! That lady that i would shyly smile at during library story time? yeah, planning a unit study collaboration this fall with her and her kiddos! Apparently some kids I taught in Awana crafts have a mother who knew virtually all the same homeschoolers I do, but we had never met....I now have a wonderful blossoming friendship with her! :)
It's challenging to step out... I am not a naturally social butterfly. But I am changing from my old "lonely only" caterpiller, bit by bit. And it is opening up a vast new world for me, this flying into homeschool friendships. I am glad for the change!
Now, the Lord has called for a difficult and heart-tugging change. And it's one that will be met with a spectrum of opinions. My husband and I have made the decision to leave our current church and begin attending and serving elsewhere. It was a VERY challenging decision. It took 6 months of prayer and careful thinking and weighing and measuring pros, cons, our children's needs, our own hearts' motives, and the overwhelming anxiety of the decision. But we reached a choice that has brought us peace of mind and heart. It's not going to be a popular choice, and I do not think most people will understand our true hearts on the matter, but that cannot be a concern for us in this time. We are choosing to hold onto the relationships that have mattered the most all along, and preserve them. We are choosing to let go of the things that have been hurtful and saddening to us from others' actions over the years. We are leaving on a pleasant note with those that are dear to our hearts, and stepping out into a new challenge, a new change. The future is uncertain ahead. As the saying goes,
"I don't know the future, but I know WHO holds the future!"
Yes, change is hard, but the challenge is good. I know He has plans for us! Jeremiah 29:11