in thinking about a new year coming up, i realise that i need to simplify. i want to wipe the slate clean and start fresh.... ive got so many irons in the fire, and so many responsibilities right now, its hard to keep track of my days sometimes.
January brings a new year, and new challenges. what will i be committed to? what do i need to let go?
i'm tenatively starting a small business (tupperware consultant.. i said it was SMALL! lol). but i dont know if i should pursue it or let it go. it could majorly subtract family time in my week, and that is not something i am ever willing to sacrifice...
teaching sunday school is very iffy for next year. the church has changed up the sunday schedule, and the idea of being there from 8 a.m. til 12 then turning around and being there from 4p.m. till 7:30 is... well, its no day of "rest" that is for sure.
my weekly Bible Study is getting more difficult to make it to each week, and with hubby out of a job, i wonder if driving across town each wednesday is worth the gas money we dont have, and then i have added volunteer babysitting for them once a month, since, you know, "I'm not doing anything"...
the doctor appointments once a week keeping me running... and i know those have to stop in January whether I need them or not. no insurance+united states health care system= can't afford it on our own....
Pink Elephant has to quit preschool... there is no $$ for it, now. so that will give me two elephants home, 7 days a week, looking to me to fill the time, and educate them.
oh yes, and there is the "small amont of time" (haha) homeschooling 5 days a week...
all of these things are pulling at me, making me busier and pressed for time, and even grumpy!
what is a mama elephant to do?
oh my goodness, what is wrong with me???
somewhere in the middle of all this rehashing of schedule and woe, i forgot the most important element, the key ingredient... HOPE.
where do i get that hope?
"I lift my eyes to the hills, where does my help come from? my help comes from the LORD, the maker of Heaven and Earth."
where do i get hope? from the ONE who gives me help!
i am not doing all these things on my own. i am not facing the unknown of unemployment, uninsured kids all on my own. i am not alone. i am held by the creator, the maker of heaven and earth. he will help me. and knowing i am held in the palm of his hand, i have hope.
i know January is rushing headlong to meet me.... and that life is changing at a lightening fast pace for me and the elephant herd. but i know that the things which HE has called me to will be made clear, and the doors HE wants to open will be open and no one or nothing will be able to shut them. i know the ONE who gives me hope for each and every day, for every minute of every activity i find myself involved in. i know HE will show me where my dedication and my commitment should be.
but where does my calling lay?
here with "hearth and home"... or "herd and home" in my case..
my two precious, growing elephants. they are my calling in life.
the rest is all "peanuts" to me... and i know the Father will help me figure it out.
and with his reassurance, i have HOPE.